MCHEZO WA TAON

It all happened in the month I decided to rob God.

Not in the dramatic way you might be imagining.

I simply didn't give my tithe that month.

I had my reasons, or at least I thought I did.

I was going through a lot. Money was tight, I was trying to figure out my career and honestly, I thought I needed that money more than God did.

Looking back, the irony is almost funny.

Because that same month, I was about to learn just how expensive it can be to put your faith in the wrong thing.

It started on a random Friday.

I got a text from my lecturer telling me there was a potential employer looking for a GIS-based employee, preferably Kale or Luo, and he wanted to know if he could refer me.

Of course I said yes. The tribal part was a bit sus but i thought aah maybe its a fieldwork job that would require a native.

Then, over WhatsApp, he sent me the guy's number and his name:

Prof. Tom Ogada.

He told me to call him the following day.

Saturday morning came.

I was excited, but nervous. I couldn't exactly call a whole "Professor" at 8 a.m. 😭 Surely he had a family. Surely professors had better things to do on a Saturday morning.

So I waited until around 11 and called.

The man was smooth.

So well-spoken. So refined. The kind of English that makes you automatically sit up a little straighter.

He said he was glad I had called and asked me to send my CV to his WhatsApp.

I did.

A little while later, he called back.

He told me my CV was really good and that I was the perfect candidate.

Then he asked what I was currently doing.

“Internship.”

“How do you survive?”

“The government gives us a stipend.”

I was giving him this information just in case he was actually going to be my employer. Let him know early that I don't work for free. 😂

Then came the salary question.

“What are your expectations?”

I tried to dodge it.

“I'd like to see what the company offers, then we can negotiate.”

He insisted I give him a figure.

Now, I had absolutely no idea what a Geospatial Engineer was supposed to earn.

So I said:

“Between 40,000 and 70,000.”

Then he said something that nearly made me lose my composure.

“Caroline, this is an international company. The basic salary is 134,000. There's comprehensive medical cover for you, your spouse and children below 18, housing allowance and commuter allowance.”

I had to remain calm on that phone call.

But in my head?

Heeh.

By the end of the year, nishajishikia kademio. 😭💔

He then told me an application form would be sent to my email, which I needed to print, fill out and return.

Except I was at my cousin's place along Naivasha Road, and there was no cyber anywhere.

We were also just about to leave for Karen.

I was already frustrated because I had been given a time limit.

My cousin told me, “Tutatafuta cyber mbele tu.”

So I carried on.

Then came the cover letter.

He even sent me the exact place I was supposed to address it.

Weeeuh. Nilipangwa. 😭😂

Then came the list of documents.

CV.

Cover letter.

Degree.

ID.

Birth certificate.

KCPE certificate.

At this point, I wasn't applying for a job. I was submitting evidence that I had existed since childhood.

He also told me that once I had sent everything, I should let him know so he could follow up with a recommendation letter.

Apparently, my lecturer was a 'good friend of his' and he was rooting for me.

Everything was adding up.

We got to Karen.

Still no cyber.

So I ended up going all the way to Galleria to print everything.

KSh 450.

Something I could have probably done for 200 bob at a local cyber.

But honestly?

Who cared?

I had an international job waiting for me.

I filled out the application form at lightning speed, submitted everything and called Prof. Tom to let him know.

Then, while I was supposed to be enjoying a family reunion, this man started calling me.

I saw the missed calls and wondered what was happening.

I called back.

He said he was calling from a board meeting.

Then he gave me the news.

I had gotten the job. 🤩😭Went ahead and even typed the congratulatory message on Whatsapp.

He had managed to convince the other board members that I was the right candidate.

I was supposed to report to their main offices in Karen on Wednesday to sign my offer letter.

Wednesday.

I had gotten the job.

Me.

Caroline.

The girl who had just confidently quoted 40–70K because she had no idea what a Geospatial Engineer was supposed to earn.

The girl who had gone looking for a cyber all over Nairobi to submit an application form before the deadline.

The girl who had spent KSh 450 at Galleria printing documents she could have printed for KSh 200 elsewhere.

Everything I had been hoping for. I would leave Baringo. I would ditch everything that stringed me in that county. So yes I was elated!

I even asked my aunty whether World Vision had offices in Karen.

She said yes.

Haiyaaa.

At this point, surely everything was solid.

Then he asked about some additional documents.

Good Conduct.

EACC clearance.

HELB clearance.

The whole Chapter Six package.

I told him I had my Good Conduct.

“When did you get it?”

“December.”

Somehow, he convinced me it had expired.

😭💔😂

It hadn't.

And because I apparently had temporarily misplaced all my common sense, I believed him.

He then told me he had a good friend at Huduma who could process the documents and have everything ready by Wednesday.

And that's how I got the number.

I texted the so-called Huduma Centre contact on WhatsApp.

The DP was a Huduma Centre logo.

The man spoke exactly like someone you would expect to be dealing with official documents.

Smooth.

Professional.

Refined English.

He said he could process everything because Prof. Ogada was a good friend of his and he often helped him.

Then he gave me the total.

KSh 10,850.

I nearly laughed.

I told him I didn't have that kind of money.

He negotiated.

Then he said he could pledge something on my behalf so that he could trust me.

“So how much do you have?”

I thought about it.

I didn't want to embarrass myself.

I didn't want to say I had nothing.

So I told him:

“2K.”

So I sent it.

He then asked for my ID number, full name and KRA PIN.

A little while later, he started sending me documents.

Three of them.

HELB clearance.

KRA Tax Compliance Certificate.

CRB clearance.

All with my details.

At this point, why would I doubt him?

I asked about the remaining documents.

That's when he said I needed to add another 3K so he could trust me completely.

And I had it.

So I wasn't worried.

In my head, the calculation was embarrassingly simple:

3K now.134K later.

Si itarudi?

You have to understand the context.

At the back of my mind, I already knew there were people who did things through the back door at Huduma Centres. I'd even heard stories of people helping others get documents quickly.

But then something in me hesitated.

I still had things I wanted to do in Nairobi before going back to Baringo, and I didn't want to keep sending money.

So I decided to ask my dad.

Initially, I hadn't wanted to tell him. I wanted to surprise him with the job.

Instead, I ended up telling him everything.

The moment he heard the story, he said:

“Hawa watu wameku-scam.”

I wasn't convinced.

He told me not to send any more money. To tell them I was broke and see what they would do.

Then he said something that stuck with me:

If the job was legitimate, they would give me time to get the documents.

I still thought Dad was being overly suspicious. What would my millenial dad know heeh!

Meanwhile, the pressure was coming from everywhere.

The “Huduma guy” kept calling.

“Please hurry.”

“The office is closing at 5.”

“We need to do this now.”

Then Tom called too.

“Caroline, please liaise quickly. The guy wants to leave the office.”

Now I was stuck between my dad telling me not to send the money and my supposed employer telling me to hurry.

Eventually, I didn't send the 3K.

Instead, I called the “Huduma guy” and told him that I had realised some of the documents he'd sent me could actually be obtained for free through the government portals.

I could download them myself in two minutes.

That was when the mask came off.

He started insulting me.

😭😭😭

And that's when I knew.

Aiii.

I had been scammed.

But I still needed confirmation.

So I called Prof. Tom.

I wanted to tell him what had happened.

I wanted an explanation.

I called.

The number was switched off.

💀😭

I called again.

Still off.

Then it hit me.

This refined, well-spoken “Professor” who had just come from a board meeting and secured me a 134K job...

was using an Airtel line.

😔

The Huduma guy?

Switched off.

Prof. Tom?

Switched off.

And suddenly, the entire story started replaying in my head.

The expired Good Conduct.

The urgency.

The documents.

The KSh 10,850.

The bargaining.

The 2K.

The extra 3K.

The calls.

The pressure.

My dad's voice telling me not to send anything.

And me thinking he was the one who didn't understand.

Turns out Babaa had understood everything.

I hadn't just lost 2K.

I had lost a job that had never existed.

A salary I had already mentally spent.

Allowances I had already counted.

A family reunion where I was mentally absent.

A future I had already started imagining.

And perhaps that's what made the whole thing so ironic.

That month, I had decided I needed my tithe more than God did.

I thought I was keeping money because I needed a financial breakthrough.

Then, in the same month, I almost paid money to people selling me a breakthrough that didn't exist.

Maybe I wasn't actually robbing God.

Maybe I was only fooling myself into thinking I could secure my future better than He could.

Because I had become so desperate for an answer that when one appeared, I never stopped to ask whether it was actually mine.

Sometimes we need enough discernment to ask whether the thing we want is actually from God.

So yes.

It all happened in the month I decided to rob God.

I didn't know then that I wasn't robbing Him of anything.

I was only reminding myself that whatever God has for me will never require me to lose my peace, my wisdom or my discernment just to receive it.

I didn't get the 134K job.

I didn't get the allowances.

I didn't get to walk into those Karen offices and sign my offer letter.

And I got to learn that not every opportunity that arrives looking like an answered prayer is an answer from God.

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Hello lovely readers!

Weeuh! I took forever to write this. It weighed me down for a minute.

Shared this so that it won't happen to you the way it did to me.

Anyway, I hope you are well.

Share, like, comment, give feedback, laugh at me if you have to!

Sending love and light!

Life update: I turned 24 yay!

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